DGM Shorts! Episode One: Family Gene Ocean
by MariRaikou
Summary: A little humor based explanation of how seemingly random characters across the anime multiverse have come to call each other brother and sister thanks to mine and my friend's OC's.


RANDOM D GRAY MAN SHORTS

Episode One: Family Gene Ocean

Alright. To begin our saga of short stories, we must first explain how all of the characters that are going to appear in this fandom are related.

First, now I don't know if you do this, but my friends and I, we select certain characters from different animes that we claim as "big brothers."

You see, as we created our original characters and placed them in the worlds of Naruto, D Grayman, Bleach and so forth and claimed our so called "big brothers" we came to some rather shocking revelations.

My original character, Mari, married, *cough* I mean uh, was _paired up_ with Kanda. Mari's half sister, Raikou, was paired up with Shesshomaru, who is my friend's character Zeada's uncle.

Did you catch all of that?

I bet you didn't.

Let me explain what that little, shall we say lapse in judgment on Mari and Raikou's parts did to the family tree that is the fandom multiverse, or at least our multiverse.

My character Mari has only claimed two big brothers. Okay, ONLY 2.

Itachi Uchiha and Byakuya Kuchiki.

Okay well and Renji, cause he's awesome. Maybe not as a big brother, but as a brother none the less.

That shouldn't cause too many problems, right?

WRONG.

See we have already connected two animes that should have stayed separate: Naruto and Bleach.

Well, then Mari was paired up with Kanda, and her half sister Raikou was paired with Shesshomaru.

Alright, now that is **four, **wait, no **5 **different animes, (forgot about Hei from Darker than BLACK being Mari's exboyfriend. Doesn't really have negative affects on the tree, I just thought it would be worth mentioning) that are now connected to these two characters.

Let me explain what that did.

It made Kanda, Itachi, Sesshomaru, Renji and Byakuya all BROTHERS by law. This also made Rukia everyone's sister and Sasuke everyones brother.

Okay, not so bad. For the most part we kept it between already related families.

Well, then there is my friend's character Zeada.

Zeada, Zeada, Zeada, always causing problems for us people who like to keep things simple.

Now, Zeada has claimed like eight or nine big brothers. I don't even know who some of them are anymore, but here are the ones that I do know:

Allen Walker- DGM

Gilbert-Pandora Hearts

Haji- Blood+

Ulquiorra Schiffer- Bleach

Blood Dupre-Alice in the Country of Hearts

Sasori-Naruto

Shiki-Vampire Knight

Beyond Birthday- Death Note

And then there is Yoruichi, who she claims as something...

Then there is Zeada's mom, Lunaria. She was Sesshmaru's brother, and she later married Gin Ichimaru.

Also, Zeada herself, has been paired up with Edward Elric of Full Metal Alchemist.

One more thing before I explain the chaos that this has created.

My other friend created a character named Luna.

We all claim Luna as a sister and she claims Grimmjow and Lavi as her brothers (I think. Bare in mind there could be more of them.) Luna, Mari, and Zeada set Lavi up on a date with Halibel and now they're together.

Okay.

SO, you ready for this?

That all made:

Kanda, Allen, Lavi, Lenalee, Komui, Sesshomaru, Inuyasha, Ulquiorra, Grimmjow, Halibel, Byakuya, Itachi, Sasori, Sasuke, Haji, Edward Elric, Alphonse, Shiki, Blood Dupre, Beyond Birthday, and potentially some other poor souls I have forgotten, brothers and sisters by law to each other and all four of our original characters, Mari, Raikou, Zeada, and Luna.

It made all of those people nieces and nephews to Yoruichi, Gin, Sesshomaru, Mari and Raikou, and I think each other...I'm not sure since Kanda is married to Mari, would that technically make Zeada his neice and thus Moyashi his brother and his nephew? Or wait is he just his nephew?

Wait, it would make half of those people Mari's brothers and sisters and the majority of them her nieces and nephews...O O

This is so jacked up.

Kanda is Allen's UNCLE. .

Whoa.

I don't even care anymore.

Let's call everyone brothers and sisters and be done with it.

*GASPS*

Holy Frack.

Can you imagine that family reunion?!

Getting all of those people in one house for birthdays and CHRISTMAS!?

That is too much for my brain to process, so we're going to move on.

We then got to thinking, what if our characters and their *cough* husbands, had children?

Space time continum of timey wimey stuff implodes!

No, not really, but we're getting close.

Anyway, if they ever had children we would have to find completely new animes to find them people to marry. Otherwise, they'd be marrying like their sister's, nephew's, cousin's on their half aunt's side, twice removed's great-grandaughter's third husband's son.

And that just won't do.

So, did you manage to keep up with all that?

I hope so, but if you didn't, just know that unless it is otherwise noted, everyone in these stories are related in a ridiculously ludicrous way.

Here is a small scene to satisfy the the ffnet patrol hounds that deem this "not fanfiction":

Ryu sat lounging on the couch, as his cousin Neko burst into the room.

"Ryu! Ryu! Ryu!" Neko said rushing up to him, bouncing up and down excitedly.

Ryu cracked an eye open to look at her, "What are you doing here?" He frowned.

Neko's grin widened, "I'm here to spend the weekend with my most awesome cousin EVER!" Neko crowed throwing her arms around him in a big hug.

Ryu groaned, a whole weekend with the energizer bunny. This was going to be a nightmare.

He peeled her off of him as he shook his head, "I still don't see how you are the daughter of Ed and Zeada. You're way too excited all the time."

She cocked her head at him strangely, "I'm super smart just like mama. The same way you're super moody like Kanda," She smiled.

Ryu whirled, "I am not moody like my father!" He roared as smoke curled from his nostrils.

Neko just stared at him, "Right."

Ryu huffed at her as his frown deepend.

"So," She said jumping up on the coffee table to get up to Ryu's level, "What are we going to do today?"

"I don't know," He shrugged, "hopefully staying away from you."

Neko pooched her lip out, "That's mean."

"I have something you can do," Mari said walking into the room.

Ryu froze, this is not good. She'll make us clean the whole house!

"What is it?" Neko asked excitedly.

Ryu cringed as if he were waiting for a death sentence.

"There are some boxes up in the attic I need you guys to bring down here."

"Oo, the attic!" Neko exclaimed, "come on Ryu!"

"No,"Ryu moaned, "Mom, do I have to stay with her all weekend?"

"Yes," Mari said coming back into the room with a vase of flowers, "And you need to be nice to her."

"But she's crazy," Ryu exclaimed.

"I don't care if she's a half demon from Hogwarts," Mari said placing the vase on the dining room table and walking over to him, "She's family. Love comes with the territory."

She wrapped him in a big hug.

"Mom," Ryu cried embarassed, "You're making my hair turn pink again."

Neko laughed and pointed, "Ha ha, Ryu has pink hair," She sang.

"Shut up you little troll," Ryu growed as he furiously tried to rub the pink out of his bangs.

* * *

-I swear I will come back and add more. Right now it is just too late, and I am too tired!-

* * *

Author's Note*

Okay, I realize this is not technically a "story" but whatever. I wrote this because my friends and I are going to start writing these DGM short stories that are centered around our OC's and a lot of the character's mentioned in this explanation. Most of it is going to take place in the the realm of DGM which is why we are calling them DGM Shorts.

There will be some about Christmas, and Halloween and others will just be about how well some characters cheat at poker. Regardless, I hope you stick around to hear about these crazy stories. If you don't, I don't really care. This is more for my friends and I to share anyway.

Laters,

Mari


End file.
